How Caregiving Expectations Hold Women Back–and What Must Change

BY Emily McCrary-Ruiz-Esparza | August 01, 2022

“A couple of years ago around this time, it felt like workplace accommodations for working parents were at an all-time high. Were we just recipients of sympathy? Is the honeymoon over?”

This is how Callum Borchers, a columnist at the Wall Street Journal who writes about people’s careers and work lives, opened a fireside chat titled “How Caregiving Expectations Hold Women Back–and What Needs to Change” during From Day One’s July virtual conference on giving working families the benefits and flexibility they need today. His interview subject was Colleen Ammerman, the director of the Gender Initiative at Harvard Business School and co-author of the book Glass Half Broken: Shattering the Barriers That Still Hold Women Back at Work.

“In some sense, the honeymoon is over,” Ammerman said. “But my hope is that we don’t abandon the consciousness-raising and shift [back] to the mentality that everyone has to figure it out for themselves, because that’s what we used to do to working parents.” What, then, can employers do to resist the backslide?

Caregiver Expectations Hold Back Women, and Men

Women disproportionately take on caregiving responsibilities, and if we want to prevent this from holding women back, the it has for so long, Borchers and Ammerman said we have to set the expectation that men are caregivers too, and make it easy for men to take parental leave. But even if men are given parental leave, they may not feel comfortable taking it. “There’s the on-the-ground reality, then there’s the policy on paper,” Borchers said.

Employers may be “missing elements of their culture, sometimes at the department level or team level, that make it that much harder for people to take advantage,” said Ammerman. She called these “micro-cultures”: the environments within a department or team, often driven by the way a manager feels about performance. One team may have a leader who prioritizes work output and another may have a leader that prioritizes time in the office. Ammerman recommended “encouraging managers to get away from those assumptions and look at what people are producing, look at what they’re doing, and define ‘How am I measuring value?’”

A fireside chat on caregiving and careers: moderator Callum Borchers of the Wall Street Journal, left, and author and academic Colleen Ammerman (Image by From Day One)

Still, many men do not take parental leave even when it’s available to them, so how do we get them to? Mandating that employees take the leave is one way, incentivizing is another, and modeling behavior is another, and perhaps the most powerful.

According to Ammerman, “There is something to be said for particularly men in leadership positions both role-modeling this and speaking up about it and setting an expectation to say, ‘Yes, I do expect all of the people in the organization who are in caregiving roles to take advantage.’”

Making Hybrid Work Possible Without Penalty 

Remote and hybrid work has made caregiving much more possible for parents, and women are likelier than men to prefer these arrangements as a result of their outsized care burden.

But, Borcher wondered, should we be concerned about proximity bias? That is, the tendency for those who work in person to get more opportunities for advancement than those who work remotely. “That’s not something that I would expect any single organization to solve,” Ammerman said. “That is an entrenched societal problem. However, organizations don’t have to further entrench that and further disadvantage women’s careers. The way that organizations approach hybrid work and how they manage who takes it up and what that means for those employees is within their span of control.”

Avoiding this is usually a matter of making performance evaluations as objective as possible. “It comes down to thinking about how we’re measuring people’s output in performance,” she said. “Are we doing it objectively? Is it job-relevant?”

One Way to End the Motherhood Penalty

The motherhood penalty is the bias women face in their perceived competence and commitment to their jobs and the subsequent hit to their pay and careers.

Early career employees may be evaluated on objective measures, but for mid-career women,  “it’s a bit more about your presence and about your relationships,” Ammerman said. “It’s a proving ground where people start to emerge as leaders or stay a little bit more at the mid-level.”

It’s here that women start encountering the motherhood penalty. “They’re facing assumptions about how committed they are to their jobs, and how much they do want to climb the ladder,” said Ammerman. Those assumptions stunt, or even end, career growth.

“You have situations where managers are making decisions for them or not giving them opportunities or just evaluating them differently. That’s where you see really that frozen middle, right where women get very stuck at the mid-level.”

Ammerman said she’s heard from women in executive roles whose early career managers passed them over for opportunities based on assumptions like, for example, they wouldn’t want to operate in certain parts of the world or wouldn’t want to spend time away from their families or deal with a particularly difficult client. What they really wanted is for their manager to ask them about the opportunity, rather than making assumptions about their work/life responsibilities.

“All of them said the point of the story was, ‘I have to tell that manager, thank you for your concern, but actually, those are the kinds of opportunities I’m interested in.’”

Reproductive Care for All Workers, Not Just Full-Time Employees

Access to reproductive health care and access to professional opportunity are positively correlated, according to the Center for American Progress, and the millions of women who lost access to abortion care following the Dobbs decision that overturned Roe v. Wade now face greater challenges to their careers.

Though many employers have made pledges to cover the cost for aboortion for their employees, regardless of where they live, this coverage is unlikely to apply to anyone other than full-time employees.

“I would encourage companies to think about the spectrum of workers who are being targeted by a lot of those policies who work for large global companies, who are knowledge workers, who already are higher-earning,” Ammerman said. The ones who won’t have access are contractors, freelancers, temporary workers, and those who work part-time.

“Companies need to be thinking about the spectrum of people that they employ, either directly or indirectly, and what’s their situation in light of the decision? It’s great to offer these kinds of support and benefits for one section of the workforce, but there’s a whole lot of people that we’re going to leave behind if companies just focus on that narrow segment.”

Emily McCrary-Ruiz-Esparza is a freelance writer based in Richmond, Virginia. She writes about the workplace, DEI, hiring, and issues faced by women. Her work has appeared in the Washington Post, Fast Company, and Food Technology, among others.


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Which Benefits Provide the Best Worker Outcomes–and Return on Investment?

There’s no end to the list of benefits employers can offer now, from pet bereavement leave to baby bonuses and ketamine therapy. But the books have to be balanced at the end of the year, and company leadership isn't inclined to cut a check for anything that doesn’t demonstrate a return on investment. Caught between job seekers who expect competitive packages and the budget-conscious C-suite, benefits professionals have to make tough choices.During From Day One’s April virtual conference on finding benefits that support individual needs without busting the budget, five benefits leaders with decades of experience gathered to discuss which benefits provide the best worker outcomes–and return on investment.Vetting New Benefits OfferingsKimberly Young is the VP of global benefits at HR tech at Amentum, a government contractor for defense, security, intelligence, energy, and environment projects. The first question she asks to vet a new benefits platform is how it will integrate into the company’s existing tech stack; otherwise, the lift to simply implement it may be too great.“The biggest challenge is how to onboard new technology and integrate it with those existing portals related to payroll, your HR data system, and other feeds,” said Young. “Additionally, we look for ease of administration and implementation. The time and resources it takes to invest and implement new technology is high on the list.”Employers have to know that adding a new benefit or platform will be worth the time, says Devin Miller, co-founder and CEO of emergency savings platform SecureSave. The communications component alone can require a lot of time and resources, so “it has to resonate, it has to be easy to administer, and employees have to like it,” he said. “It has to be cost-effective, and then it has to be provable so that you can stand up in front of a management and say ‘this is the impact we’re having.’”Communicating With a Multigenerational Workforce“As benefits professionals, [communication] is an age-old struggle,” said Elizabeth Chappelear, North American head of strategic benefits at life sciences and biotech firm MilliporeSigma. “Employees don’t care about their benefits until they need them, so we have to make sure that when they do need it, they can find it.”Panelists agreed that the familiar challenge of communicating benefits isn’t made easier by the current makeup of the labor force. “This is the first time we’ve had five generations in our workforce, and that means different preferences,” Chappelear commented. Her team is creating home mailers at the same time they’re posting QR codes in the breakroom, hosting webinars and virtual benefit fairs, and building microsites. “We’re constantly challenging ourselves to evolve that communication to meet our employees where they are.”When Carrie Theisen revamped Fannie Mae’s benefits for the first time in more than a decade, communication was one of the first things she tackled. “I start with communication, because it’s just so critical,” said Theisen, who is the lending company’s SVP of total rewards.Theisen began by surveying all employees. She learned that more than three-quarters of employees were happy with the benefits package, but they also found that workers were requesting benefits that Fannie Mae already offered. “That told me that we had a good, solid package, but we just weren’t communicating it well.”Given the size of benefits packages now, total rewards leaders have to be marketers as well. Theisen’s strategy was to create a value proposition and a brand for their benefits, centered around a five-pillar graphic. “Then we looked to add a lot of low-cost benefits that we could implement quickly, then packaged those two things together. The new branding with the new benefits helped build excitement with employees, and it’s become a key differentiator for us.” In fact, their benefits satisfaction score went from 79% to 91% in a single year.Emily McCrary-Ruiz-Esparza moderated the conversation among benefits experts from SecureSave, MilliporeSigma, Spring Health, Fannie Mae, and Amentum (photo by From Day One)For those who need to increase uptake, an immediately applicable benefit can be an easy avenue into broader benefits engagement, said Miller. That starts to tip the scales of the equitable exchange of the benefits–you just got to get them engaged in the process, and finding a broadly based appealing program is an important first step.”Expanding Benefits to Reach an Entire WorkforceBenefits that would have been rare differentiators a decade ago–like mental healthcare access and fertility treatments–are now common features of benefits packages. What’s the next evolution?The next wave is specialized programs for high-touch conditions, says Casey Smolka, head of actuarial analytics at mental health benefits platform Spring Health. By expanding healthcare into specialized programs, employers are able to support workers with often overlooked needs. And it can still be a cost-effective addition, he said. “Everybody has a really solid therapy program, but what are you doing for substance use disorder? It’s a really costly condition, and you may have only a couple of people who need the support, but if you don’t give them the support they need, the cost to your company and to the employee is astronomical.”Some benefits are retention-boosters. Smolka looked at Spring Health’s own workforce and found that those who engage with the company’s mental health benefits have a 22% higher stay rate than those who don’t.SecureSave’s Miller noted that access to benefits isn’t always equally distributed, with white collar workers often “soaking up” the bulk of the benefits budget. Perks aimed at hourly and low-wage workers–emergency savings programs, for example–can be a way to support workers at all levels, from the office to the shop floor.Some panelists acknowledged how challenging it can be to find the right constellation of benefits for some demographics–Young, for instance, is still looking for the right partner to serve Amentum’s LGBTQ+ community. Others talked about having to forgo some popular benefits–like student loan repayment and lifestyle spending accounts–because they’re just too costly.Yet all agreed that the most impactful provisions don’t necessarily have to be budgeted for. Fannie Mae doubled its parental leave from six to 12 weeks, added caregiver leave, catastrophe leave, bereavement leave, grandparent leave, plus added more vacation time and extended flexible schedules.“People want to make more money, they want time off, they want retirement, they want good health care. Those are the table-stakes components,” said Miller. “You want to strengthen those programs, and make sure that people use them and value them, but you really need something that is going to be impactful for your organization.”Emily McCrary-Ruiz-Esparza is an independent journalist and From Day One contributing editor who writes about work, the job market, and women’s experiences in the workplace. Her work has appeared in the BBC, the Economist, the Washington Post, Quartz, Fast Company, and Digiday’s Worklife.

Emily McCrary-Ruiz-Esparza | April 10, 2024

Where to Start: Making the Workplace Inclusive of Neurodiversity

It’s estimated that 15–20% of the global population is neurodivergent in some way, and growing awareness of diagnoses has people curious. They want to learn more about the term, what it means, and how they can support people who identify that way.Neurodivergence describes so many different experiences, but generally, people who are neurodivergent process information differently than most individuals. This includes people on the autism spectrum, people with learning disabilities, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and Tourette’s syndrome.Millette Granville is the VP of diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) at digital learning platform 2U. She’s seen the appetite in her company and has been pleasantly surprised by the enthusiasm. “We have over 200 employees that are actively engaged in our abilities resource network. They were really, truly ready to get started building the community. I was not as prepared for the thirst for knowledge from our people, from leaders, as well as our employees about what exactly we need to do to make sure we are supporting our employees.During From Day One’s February virtual conference on getting to the next stage of diversity and belonging, Granville and her industry colleagues gathered for a panel discussion on neurodiversity in the workplace and how they’re changing their organizations to be more inclusive of neurodiverse needs.Neurodivergence can describe so many different diagnoses, experiences, and needs. It can also be invisible. “Neurodiversity is hidden in plain sight all around us,” said Hal Lanier, client engagement leader at accessible tech company TextHelp. So how does a workplace become inclusive if the needs can be hard to identify?An Inclusive Interview ProcessSome leaders begin with the hiring process. Monica Parodi, VP of talent acquisition at The New York Times, said she’s starting at the beginning, using tools to comb their job descriptions for noninclusive language. They’re also adding details about the hiring process to the company’s career pages so candidates can prepare in advance and avoid uncomfortable surprises.The panelists discussed the topic "How Companies Are Embracing Neurodiversity in Innovative Ways" at From Day One's virtual conferenceOnce candidates get to the interview stage, they’ll see other changes. “We know that the first 30 seconds [of an interview] are really uncomfortable for a lot of people who are neurodivergent. 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Crafford uses his personal point of view to design better learning experiences, often asking himself, “how would I have to learn the material?”For instance, Crafford talks to his audience to understand their learning styles, he teaches concepts, not just rote memorization. “It’s designed to be simplified. It’s built for all learners, divergent and neurotypical. We make sure that people can interact with the information through discussions and gain others’ perspectives.”At aerospace and defense technology company Northrop Grumman, VP of talent management Jackie Reisner considers use cases when creating and evaluating skill development and training programs. Who’s going to be using it? Can you involve them in the design? Can you ask them what does and doesn’t work about the programs?Perhaps most importantly, does everyone have to complete the training in exactly the same way? Because neurodivergence represents non-traditional ways of processing information, it represents many different learning styles.“This is something that we have to be more open-minded about: there’s got to be more than one way to get to the goal,” said Reisner. When and how the training is delivered should be flexible and adaptable by the learner. The goal is that everyone learns, not that everyone completes the training in the same way.“I know from a compliance perspective, that feels challenging, because you want to just check ‘yes, everyone in my company took ethics training,’ Reisner said. “But if you can get more models, more ways people can get to that end state, then you’re going to see so much more success.”Don’t Assume, AskThe challenge for many who are neurodivergent is that they will prefer not to disclose their diagnosis at work–and others may not know they’re not neurotypical. That’s why many leaders are making these changes and accommodations available to all employees–not just those who openly identify as neurodivergent. No one should be forced to disclose neurodivergence if they don’t want to. “An individual should not be required to disclose to get assistive technology,” said Lanier of TextHelp. “There are a lot of organizations that make our product available for everyone.”The best practice is to simply ask employees what they need, panelists said, and be open to creativity. “Companies come up with all these accommodations, and it looks like a list to choose from. That can be great, but you have to remember to ask people what they need as well,” said Reisner. “At the end of the day, we have to ask, ‘how can we make your life easier? What are you seeing as challenges in the workplace, and what would be the ideal state to make this workplace a great place for you to work regardless of that neurodiversity status?’”At 2U, Granville leans on the neurodiversity resource networks for ideas and policy review, also considering parents and caregivers who are responsible for neurodivergent family members. “We rely on good communication and connection,” she said. “If leaders have questions, they can lean into our resource groups, myself, or our DEI team and also HR to make sure that we’re guiding people in the right direction, and doing what's best for them, not what we think they need.”To Lanier, it’s a matter of psychological safety, and high-performing teams feel free to be themselves. “Is it safe to take risks and be vulnerable and be fully known?” he said. A workplace that is psychologically safe is welcoming to all, neurodivergent or not.Emily McCrary-Ruiz-Esparza is a freelance journalist and From Day One contributing editor who writes about work, the job market, and women’s experiences in the workplace. Her work has appeared in the BBC, the Economist, the Washington Post, Quartz, Fast Company, and Digiday’s Worklife.

Emily McCrary-Ruiz-Esparza | March 29, 2024

How to Create and Sustain a Growth Mindset to Nurture Talent

When Dr. Mary Murphy was working on her PhD at Stanford, she was mentored by Carol S. Dweck, best-selling author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, a book that covers the potential of individuals. Now a social psychologist, Murphy has taken the mindset concept a step further and for over a decade has studied how the “fixed” or "growth” mindset affects not only individuals, but groups of people. Murphy discussed research from her book, Cultures of Growth: How the New Science of Mindset Can Transform Individuals, Teams, and Organizations, and how it can help teams during a fireside chat at From Day One’s March Virtual Conference.Those with a fixed mindset, Murphy says, believe in being born with skills that can’t grow any further. While those with a growth mindset believe they can learn and grow into new abilities. When talking about teams, organizations, families—there is a similar mindset culture.In a fixed mindset culture, or a “culture of genius” as Murphy called it, the focus is on the star performers. The opposite is a “culture of growth” where there is a focus on continuous learning so anyone can grow and contribute. And it’s that culture of growth that organizations need.Idea SparkIn 2005 during her PhD program, Murphy clearly recalled when this group application of mindset sparked. She was at a grad student seminar supporting a friend, where a professor voiced his opinion about what the fatal flaw of this student’s work was. Another professor chimed in and disagreed, saying the fatal flaw was something else. In essence, it was a battle of which professor was right.“I saw what it was doing to my friend,” she said. “All of a sudden, he lost focus. He wasn’t able to answer questions.” Unfortunately, the experience was so painful that months later he hadn’t continued his work.Two weeks later, in a different seminar, she witnessed something else. Rather than critiquing the students about what was wrong, the professors offered ideas on how to grow the project. The effect was clear. “The students were able to respond totally differently,” Murphy said. “They were able to actually engage in the brainstorming, answer the questions, and they left motivated to dig in.”Reflecting on those two experiences or environments, she realized how much a group can impact an outcome. The harsh approach was not motivating at all. On the other hand, the mentality of growth and how we can all contribute really turned things around for the better.Dr. Mary Murphy discussed her new book Cultures of Growth: How the New Science of Mindset Can Transform Individuals, Teams, and Organizations in a fireside chat moderated by From Day One co-founder Steve Koepp (photo by From Day One)Murphy presented the idea to her new mentor, asking what if mindset is more than just internal? What if it’s baked into culture and influences the cultivation of talent? She blinked a few times and said, “No one's ever thought of mindset this way. But we should do it together. And that began 15 years of work on reconceptualizing the mindset, as not just in our head, but also as this cultural feature.”Time to StudyNow with 75 studies in her back pocket, Murphy has seen firsthand just how deep mindset goes. Murphy and Dweck looked at the mindset of teachers and faculty members in K-12 and college and how they practice that in the classroom.“We look at how that impacts student experience. We’ve created apps that actually measure student experience in the moment looking at their sense of belonging, whether they think their teacher has a growth mindset, belief for them or not, their sense of self efficacy, their trust of the teacher.”What they found was that even if a student has a growth mindset, when set into a fixed mindset culture, they won’t have the opportunity to benefit from their growth mindset. The group trumps and stilts their progress.  In the National Study of Learning Mindsets, a randomized control trial of more than 12,000 students around the country underwent a growth mindset program to see how it would impact their grades and if they’d be willing to take challenging courses. As expected, it had a positive effect. Their GPA was higher and more of them enrolled in the challenging courses than the control group. They also looked at where the program didn’t work.“The answer was two places,” Murphy said. “It was with teachers that had more fixed mindset beliefs or engaged in fixed mindset practices, then giving students that personal growth mindset. The effect was zero. It had no impact. It wasn't even a small impact – it had no impact.”The other place it didn’t work was when peers didn’t engage in challenge seeking, then students were less likely to want to work hard. But when there were teachers and peers who relished a challenge and supported each other, the growth mindset helped students flourish.Organizational CultureWorking with companies of all shapes and sizes, Murphy saw similar results. The mindset of a team at large has a huge impact on creativity, collaboration, and innovation. In one study in particular, they looked at the difference between a psychologically safe environment and a growth minded environment. They found that psychological safety is the baseline for any other growth to take place.“Psychological safety just means that you're willing to speak up when something’s gone wrong. But growth mindset culture really is being vigilant about how to improve what you’re doing, your interactions with others, the outcomes and the strategies that you’re trying. You’re proactively looking for improvement opportunities.”In fixed mindset cultures, they search for the narrow genius prototype to come up with all the answers. When in reality, a growth culture would open up the spectrum of recruiting, looking more at positive values. As Murphy says, a growth culture helps organizations naturally look for more diversity. “What’s most important is the extent to which people are willing to develop, grow and learn.”Changing Company CultureIn her book, Murphy goes over four common mindset triggers which can help individuals understand where people are on the fixed to growth spectrum. In turn, those who work with those individuals can help them shift. For example, one trigger is praise. If someone else gets praise, how does the person react? Are they happy for them, or are they jealous, thinking they are less than? One way to help foster a growth mindset is how praise is given. Rather than a “good job!” which doesn’t offer helpful feedback, Murphy suggested managers repeat what the person has done so well, so they can replicate that and others can encourage.When Satya Nadella first came to Microsoft as CEO, he described Microsoft as everyone thinking about their own silo. He read Dweck’s book and wanted to help Microsoft become the first growth minded culture and company. Kathleen Hogan, head of talent, asked how things needed to change so they could recruit and onboard people that would help shift the company’s culture. She implemented changes, but success didn’t come right away. Some bragged they had the biggest growth mindset in the room. “She had to really talk to people about what a growth mindset actually looks like. And to bake that in to some of the incentive systems and also some of the mentoring and sponsoring and support systems so that people could take on challenges could make mistakes, and actually get points for the learning and the growth from those mistakes and the communicating of those mistakes across the company, so that the whole company can learn at the same time more rapidly.” That’s when things picked up. Slowly but surely, the culture was changing. It became okay to make mistakes, but putting out ideas and taking risks and being open to failure became the norm. And that’s how they got cloud computing. Was the culture change worth it? No doubt about it.Carrie Snider is a Phoenix-based journalist and marketing copywriter.

Carrie Snider | March 28, 2024